Monday, June 23, 2008

Secular Report: No One Wants Latin Mass

By Patrick Archbold

The East Valley Tribune wants you to know that nobody wants the Latin Mass. I mean it, they really want you to know that nobody wants the Latin Mass. No, really. Really Really. Aren't you listening? They really really really want you to know that nobody wants the Latin Mass in Phoenix.

This one has to be a record folks. What follows is just the excerpts of one of the most lopsided secular reports on the Gregorian Rite to date. And that is saying something. Remember, this is just the highlights.
"I think it's boring," said 82-year-old Mary Douglas of Tempe, a longtime member of St. Mary's parish in Chandler, saying the church should be more concerned with retaining young Catholics. "What can we do to make people to stop leaving the church?" ['cause 82 year old cranky ladies are in touch with the youngins]
...
But East Valley Catholics doubt many would turn out for such Masses after initial curiosity or the novelty ended. So they wonder about the value in training current parish priests in Latin and teaching them to properly lead the old Mass, with its distinctive chants and precise rituals. [Would that be all East Valley Catholics? Did we ask them all? How many did we talk to?]
...
"I don't think very many Catholics are going to go back to the Tridentine Latin Mass," said the Rev. John Cunningham, the founding priest of St. Bridget parish in Mesa and St. Mary Magdalene parish in Gilbert. "They have lived with the New Mass for 40 years, and I believe they find it more meaningful and expressive of their faith." [Oh, the Rev. John Cunningham who was suspended for concelebrating Mass with a non-Catholic priest. Gotta keep him at the top of the rolodex.]
...
"I haven't had any requests in my parish for the Latin Mass," said the Rev. Doug Lorig, pastor of St. Maria Goretti parish in Scottsdale. He has not heard of any of his parishioners regularly attending the 6:30 a.m. daily Mass at St. Thomas the Apostle in Phoenix or one at 1 p.m. Sundays that typically draws as many as 250 worshipers."[No one is asking for it. Got it. Have you offered it?]

"They haven't asked for it, and I haven't made any kind of offering for it," Lorig said. [Don't ask don't tell!] For priests, he said, it would take extensive training to meet the rubrics and procedures of the Mass not commonly experienced by Catholics in decades. It's much more than just mastering Latin, he said, "You have to learn all the liturgical movements, and everything behind it." Lorig predicted "a lot of priests are going to hesitate, and they certainly aren't going to do it if there is no call for it." [Ok, we got it. Really. Stop now, please.]
...
"I don't see a need to see it in every parish," [Stop now, please. Really, we got it!] said Betty Bova, a member of St. Bernard of Clairvaux parish in Scottsdale. Those who want the Latin Mass "could travel a little bit and just go to it," she said. If her parish had such a Mass mixed into its weekend schedule, "I would probably attend once just for curiosity and for old-time sake, because when I was little, that is what we did," Bova said.
...
Allison Walters, a 38-year-old Tempean with St. Andrew the Apostle parish in Chandler, said she hears no call from her Catholic peers for a Latin Mass. [What is wrong with you? Stop saying that! I mean it!] "I appreciate it for the history and the charm, how it once was," Walters said. "I would want to attend it once and experience it once, but I wouldn't do it on a regular basis."
...
"You would have to attend it pretty regularly to figure it out," [Ineffable stupidity?] she said, adding that the priest's homily in English now has great meaning to her, but likely she would not make such a connection if she listened to it in Latin.[What?!? This one made me laugh! Homily in Latin? What the ....?]
...
Jay Kilroy, a parishioner of Queen of Peace in Mesa, said he was "very refreshed by Vatican II. I thought it was a great move in the right direction." He would not attend a Latin Mass if it was offered at his church. "I have not felt or sensed that there was a groundswell of people who like the Latin Mass," he said. [Listen up dude, you say it one more time and I am coming down there!]
...
He said today's younger priests seem to be "more conservative, in general, and display a penchant for traditionalism when it comes to the liturgy," so "some of them, no doubt, will be pleased with the return to the Tridentine Mass in Latin and its 16th century theology," said Cunningham, a religious studies instructor at Arizona State University. [Now that was just uncalled for!]
...
"I have never heard any of my friends being serious about returning to the Latin Mass," said Harold "Hal" White, a member of Church of the Resurrection parish in Tempe. "We just don't talk about it. ... If they want it, I think it's fine. I don't think I would go back to it." [That's IT!!! Honey, pack my bags. I am going to Phoenix!! Where did I put my baseball bat?]

2 comments:

Catholicity said...

"I think it's boring" says loads about the person making the statement and little or nothing about the Mass.

People with keen intellects and active imaginations are seldom bored.

Troglodytes live passively to be entertained, like spoiled four year olds.

Chironomo said...

From the "scope" of the sampling used for this article's claims, we can conclude that at least 5 parishioners and 2 Priests from the Diocese of Phoenix are definitely not interested in the Traditional Latin Mass. Really. At least 5 people have definitely said they are not interested. And 2 Priests. Really. They also say that some of their friends probably wouldn't be interested either. Really. They wouldn't be interested. Well... they might go once, but they might not like it enough to return. Well, they might return, but they wouldn't keep going. Too often. And they wouldn't take their kids. All the time at least. Unless theyliked it. But they won't, at least they might not....